Hell-arious...

From Jaci, the lady who cuts my hair...


The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student.



The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via
the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it
as well :

Bonus Question : Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it
expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:
 
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at
which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which
is unlikely.. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell,
it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are
entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world
today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to
Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not
belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in
Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the
volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the
temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the
temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a
cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that
I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure
that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this
theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting
any more souls and is therefore, extinct..... ....leaving only Heaven, thereby
proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa
kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT
RECEIVED AN A+.

~~~~~~

I don't know if the student really received an A+ or not, but it is kinda funny...