The sporadic musings of a middle aged man who isn't exactly happy with the direction America is taking today....
Spot on !
"Dude looks like a lady" Aerosmith. ...Why is she calling here? WTF does she want? Just say NO! Hang up the dang phone and drive! or ...Soo solly, wong numbah!! You go home now, you eat too much, you too big, you no come back he-ah. You been he-ah for too long now, seven and one haf year too long, go home, get off frighing phone, go home kahtoy! You no call back! We not interwested. You cost too much.
When I use to get a call from a superior officer (BN XO) that I didn't like, I would either push the phone off the desk (Ah, shit, Sir. I'm sorry. One of the clerks tripped over the wire. Are you OK? Are you still there?) or I'd put the receiver in an empty drawer and rattle it around (Sir, you're breaking up.). Being in air defense in Germany, I had a barracks / orderly room on the kaserne and then the IHAWK TACSITE. I'd tell the orderly room, "If MAJ G calls, tell him I'm at the TACSITE." Then I'd call the TACSITE and tell them, "If MAJ G calls, tell him I'm in my office." After about two or three days, he'd get big 4th POC in his little Renault and drive from Wurzburg to Kitzingen (12 miles) and ask me where the Hell have I been? He'd never call me at home. It drove him crazy and provided some entertainment for me. Can't get away with that today.
Only a few more months and they will be gone. Maybe. ;)
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